








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 472 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 248 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2180 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,954 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1353 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1740 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3047 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1814 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $968,789 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DEE | 52% | 33 |
| #2 | Kra | 47% | 74 |
| #3 | Ben | 46% | 94 |
| #4 | pewpew | 42% | 85 |
| #5 | basti_486. | 42% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Ben | 46% | 94 |
| #4 | pewpew | 42% | 85 |
| #5 | basti_486. | 42% | 55 |
| #6 | bauer | 40% | 15 |
| #7 | rosham' | 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kra | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Ben | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | pewpew | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | basti_486. | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kra | 161 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | Ben | 125 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | DEE | 69 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | basti_486. | 54 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | rosham' | 47 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kra | +2.47 | 60 | 61 |
| #2 | Ben | +0.72 | 50 | 62 |
| #3 | pewpew | +0.15 | 56 | 55 |
| #4 | rosham' | +0.03 | 43 | 37 |
| #5 | DEE | -0.03 | 28 | 65 |





