








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 236 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,356 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1368 | 12% |
| Smokes | 3690 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2674 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3624 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,383,917 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bamplbee | 56% | 52 |
| #2 | dr3amer_k | 48% | 204 |
| #3 | mathes_cz | 47% | 321 |
| #4 | pomatenej | 47% | 85 |
| #5 | tusil_cz | 46% | 284 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | mathes_cz | 47% | 321 |
| #4 | pomatenej | 47% | 85 |
| #5 | tusil_cz | 46% | 284 |
| #6 | fX* | 46% | 223 |
| #7 | aD* | 46% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tusil_cz | 12 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | fX* | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | dr3amer_k | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | mathes_cz | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | aD* | 4 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dr3amer_k | 754 | 0.18 | 17 min |
| #2 | tusil_cz | 621 | 0.10 | 16 min |
| #3 | mathes_cz | 397 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #4 | fX* | 305 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #5 | aD* | 221 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bamplbee | +2.08 | 43 | 67 |
| #2 | dr3amer_k | +1.38 | 66 | 72 |
| #3 | tusil_cz | -0.11 | 56 | 68 |
| #4 | mathes_cz | -0.65 | 32 | 48 |
| #5 | aD* | -0.77 | 37 | 58 |





