








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 543 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3791 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,636 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2203 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1675 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 3755 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 2003 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,046,291 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 96 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | MoOnTy | 51% | 120 |
| #12 | PaNda ツ | 46% | 26 |
| #13 | Smakenzi | 45% | 22 |
| #14 | 🏅Blooder | 41% | 22 |
| #15 | SNEKO' | 36% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MoOnTy | 11 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | JeffowOw | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | magic | 8 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | NIKEN | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | PHENOM_pew_pew | 3 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MoOnTy | 394 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | NIKEN | 264 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | j0fa | 157 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #4 | magic | 148 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | JeffowOw | 144 | 0.05 | 4 min |





