










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 298 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 92 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3092 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,330 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2823 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2551 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3251 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2705 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,025,922 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 104 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Njakke | 52% | 64 |
| #4 | glENn | 51% | 266 |
| #5 | Adolen | 50% | 30 |
| #6 | vebb | 50% | 209 |
| #7 | nollzero | 45% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glENn | 1275 | 0.24 | 38 min |
| #2 | vebb | 984 | 0.24 | 37 min |
| #3 | nollzero | 258 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #4 | Njakke | 147 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | phyx | 79 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glENn | +1.14 | 90 | 76 |
| #2 | vebb | +0.89 | 86 | 77 |
| #3 | Njakke | +0.79 | 80 | 65 |
| #4 | Jeddan | +0.23 | 79 | 67 |
| #5 | phyx | -1.32 | 65 | 68 |





