








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 298 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 146 matches | ||
| Premier | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5240 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,268 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3909 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4779 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3920 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3660 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,217,717 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 165 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kadsen | 60% | 35 |
| #2 | R1c0la | 58% | 43 |
| #3 | Rubaka | 56% | 62 |
| #4 | sundae | 56% | 106 |
| #5 | rojo | 55% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | CHRISP | 50% | 30 |
| #9 | meric4l | 48% | 31 |
| #10 | 🔴 | 47% | 104 |
| #11 | 2Low | 45% | 29 |
| #12 | fater | 43% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sundae | 14 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | 🔴 | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | oNx | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | rojo | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | CHRISP | 3 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oNx | 520 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | sundae | 341 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | 🔴 | 301 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | rojo | 268 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #5 | fater | 194 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sundae | +2.64 | 87 | 67 |
| #2 | rojo | +1.95 | 86 | 74 |
| #3 | CHRISP | +1.68 | 75 | 73 |
| #4 | oNx | +1.64 | 84 | 74 |
| #5 | R1c0la | +1.53 | 81 | 49 |





