








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 469 matches | ||
| Faceit | 462 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14612 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 44,451 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12006 | 27% |
| Smokes | 9136 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 11837 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 11472 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,117,394 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2134 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | beastcat | 78% | 89 |
| #2 | NDB | 77% | 166 |
| #3 | x x | 77% | 60 |
| #4 | Shenzie_db | 77% | 81 |
| #5 | nate | 76% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Señor Bell | 72% | 57 |
| #10 | pierre | 71% | 63 |
| #11 | hopoverhoodofjaguarlikeajaguar | 71% | 66 |
| #12 | Lugia | 70% | 70 |
| #13 | ツ Scout ツ | 70% | 437 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thanny | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | ツ Scout ツ | 6 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | pierre | 6 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | hopoverhoodofjaguarlikeajaguar | 6 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | NDB | 4 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ Scout ツ | 1785 | 0.19 | 40 min |
| #2 | cricks | 635 | 0.26 | 14 min |
| #3 | NDB | 611 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #4 | Shenzie_db | 339 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #5 | nate | 301 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | redtext | +3.59 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | ツ Scout ツ | +2.60 | 90 | 64 |
| #3 | NDB | +2.05 | 86 | 59 |
| #4 | thanny | +1.74 | 85 | 51 |
| #5 | x x | +1.14 | 67 | 59 |





