










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 31 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 18 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
316 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,964 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 622 | 32% |
| Smokes | 554 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 376 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 412 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $63,931 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YunG skjerK^ | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | TOP G | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | asger | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | Vegi | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | twitch.tv/Licale | 67% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | SirahBo$$ | 33% | 3 |
| #17 | TMB • WAOO | 0% | 2 |
| #18 | haaAAAa | 0% | 2 |
| #19 | Altekz | 0% | 2 |
| #20 | Chr1zN | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nifo | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | johannes | 39 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #2 | Keoz | 29 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #3 | nifo | 27 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | IceBerg | 24 | 0.25 | 0 min |
| #5 | Kristou | 12 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keoz | +2.78 | 93 | 70 |
| #2 | SirahBo$$ | +2.50 | 89 | 66 |
| #3 | b0denmaster | +2.49 | 56 | 56 |
| #4 | Ronez | +2.00 | 85 | 43 |
| #5 | nifo | +1.77 | 94 | 73 |





