








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 562 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 41 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 84 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5398 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,597 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4737 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4810 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3137 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3913 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,260,216 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0ld m1lk | 62% | 175 |
| #2 | toxinatoR! | 60% | 141 |
| #3 | okclake | 58% | 83 |
| #4 | cJm[dodealers][tirtytree] | 56% | 240 |
| #5 | jarrod | 55% | 433 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jarrod | 4 | 0.0005 |
| #2 | toxinatoR! | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | n4yrb | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | c0ld m1lk | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | dip ship | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0ld m1lk | 874 | 0.26 | 27 min |
| #2 | jarrod | 619 | 0.07 | 21 min |
| #3 | toxinatoR! | 553 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #4 | n4yrb | 522 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #5 | dip ship | 504 | 0.24 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0ld m1lk | +3.37 | 88 | 85 |
| #2 | rymo | +1.79 | 77 | 70 |
| #3 | toxinatoR! | +1.06 | 76 | 80 |
| #4 | jarrod | +0.84 | 59 | 61 |
| #5 | gaul | +0.80 | 76 | 61 |





