








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 575 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 386 matches | ||
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5341 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,017 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5116 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6738 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3746 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5417 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,676,863 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 183 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaCo | 59% | 135 |
| #2 | Shady | 56% | 320 |
| #3 | Pepper Peerd ♞ | 53% | 245 |
| #4 | squeeze | 53% | 106 |
| #5 | Nazarius | 52% | 298 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shady | 13 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Nazarius | 6 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Pepper Peerd ♞ | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | ayeKaramba | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | ceurm | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shady | 1830 | 0.28 | 45 min |
| #2 | Nazarius | 1315 | 0.22 | 32 min |
| #3 | BaCo | 592 | 0.21 | 14 min |
| #4 | Pepper Peerd ♞ | 564 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #5 | ayeKaramba | 211 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shady | +2.32 | 75 | 71 |
| #2 | BaCo | +1.64 | 75 | 68 |
| #3 | ayeKaramba | +0.67 | 79 | 73 |
| #4 | Capwithbeard. | +0.24 | 68 | 68 |
| #5 | squeeze | +0.23 | 83 | 72 |





