








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 69 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2798 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,859 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3591 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3620 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3603 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3045 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $653,002 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 91 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rooties | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Daquiri | 59% | 34 |
| #3 | TetumTede | 54% | 28 |
| #4 | allu | 52% | 25 |
| #5 | Greedo | 52% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toumee | 10 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Kalamestari | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Kyösti Kustaa | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | VonTub | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Daquiri | 4 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toumee | 412 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #2 | Kalamestari | 302 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | Düfus Paelli | 299 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | Kyösti Kustaa | 234 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #5 | VonTub | 210 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | allu | +1.92 | 73 | 73 |
| #2 | 1ѮѮ7 | +1.82 | 67 | 62 |
| #3 | Tarvike | +1.68 | 59 | 52 |
| #4 | Daquiri | +0.66 | 52 | 71 |
| #5 | Toumee | +0.38 | 66 | 72 |





