








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 57 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1544 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,605 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1013 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1209 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 674 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 709 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $736,922 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 88 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fl4sh | 52% | 46 |
| #2 | koenipstone | 47% | 148 |
| #3 | Vapesteel | 45% | 182 |
| #4 | fmtKruse | 45% | 67 |
| #5 | Sefruz | 41% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vapesteel | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | koenipstone | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Sefruz | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | fmtKruse | 5 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | fl4sh | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koenipstone | 656 | 0.22 | 17 min |
| #2 | Vapesteel | 555 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #3 | Sefruz | 334 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | fl4sh | 163 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | fmtKruse | 121 | 0.09 | 4 min |





