








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 111 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 138 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,533 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3571 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2446 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2218 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2298 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,316,627 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kazay | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | rancho | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | tudo | 55% | 96 |
| #4 | Le . G | 55% | 53 |
| #5 | TAM_ | 54% | 139 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | N. | 44% | 82 |
| #12 | Arkoz | 41% | 41 |
| #13 | [dA]Skunk. | 41% | 39 |
| #14 | dxpot | 40% | 114 |
| #15 | SneakyZ L'Arsouille | 37% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TAM_ | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | MARLEY420_ | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | bmaby | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Arkoz | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | N. | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bmaby | 979 | 0.21 | 20 min |
| #2 | MARLEY420_ | 762 | 0.17 | 20 min |
| #3 | TAM_ | 392 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #4 | tudo | 315 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #5 | dxpot | 215 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tudo | +4.54 | 73 | 81 |
| #2 | SneakyZ L'Arsouille | +1.14 | 74 | 54 |
| #3 | bmaby | +1.04 | 78 | 65 |
| #4 | Le . G | +0.83 | 65 | 74 |
| #5 | rancho | +0.80 | 73 | 80 |





