








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 747 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 509 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5404 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6442 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5108 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 5653 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 5186 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $909,554 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 128 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | costerfunk | 64% | 39 |
| #2 | romeo | 61% | 46 |
| #3 | NOT VERY GOOD | 59% | 27 |
| #4 | kenzwoo | 59% | 81 |
| #5 | Tread | 58% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Tread | 58% | 31 |
| #6 | mythii | 56% | 34 |
| #7 | Cereal Killa | 55% | 49 |
| #8 | yob | 48% | 379 |
| #9 | rolybee | 41% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yob | 4 | 0.0005 |
| #2 | mythii | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | costerfunk | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yob | 798 | 0.09 | 19 min |
| #2 | kenzwoo | 295 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | mythii | 191 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #4 | Tread | 122 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | romeo | 110 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SWEARINGJONNY | +1.60 | 89 | 71 |
| #2 | kenzwoo | +1.60 | 79 | 63 |
| #3 | costerfunk | +1.59 | 85 | 63 |
| #4 | yob | +0.76 | 79 | 64 |
| #5 | Cereal Killa | +0.58 | 67 | 56 |





