








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 28 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2955 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,819 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2858 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3373 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2105 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2483 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $603,700 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 68 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | tazzird | 44% | 16 |
| #12 | YuNaNa!- | 43% | 28 |
| #13 | yoyo506 | 43% | 96 |
| #14 | 🅽🅰🆃🅾 | 37% | 30 |
| #15 | Sora | 24% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrPiggyy.小猪先生. | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | geve | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Sora | 4 | 0.0093 |
| #4 | yoyo506 | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | 🅽🅰🆃🅾 | 3 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yoyo506 | 299 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #2 | MrPiggyy.小猪先生. | 275 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #3 | hack = retard | 206 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #4 | geve | 188 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | KANG | 155 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | geve | +2.22 | 86 | 61 |
| #2 | ✪ Healer | +2.13 | 85 | 54 |
| #3 | KANG | +2.09 | 62 | 71 |
| #4 | SHELDON LEE COOPER | +2.05 | 76 | 65 |
| #5 | game is cooked | +1.88 | 71 | 76 |





