








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 106 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
638 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 533 | 21% |
| Smokes | 806 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 543 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 707 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $317,295 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Du Er God | 42% | 52 |
| #6 | Bot Muhammed | 40% | 5 |
| #7 | Dottore | 39% | 72 |
| #8 | Anda! | 33% | 18 |
| #9 | Nørgaard | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Du Er God | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Dottore | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Frizzer-DK | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Woundet^^ | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frizzer-DK | 118 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | Du Er God | 99 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Dottore | 88 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Woundet^^ | 80 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Nørgaard | 42 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bot Muhammed | +10.46 | 82 | 73 |
| #2 | Woundet^^ | +5.86 | 92 | 61 |
| #3 | Stulle | +3.22 | 59 | 58 |
| #4 | Nørgaard | +1.85 | 78 | 47 |
| #5 | Du Er God | +1.26 | 75 | 67 |





