








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1381 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,518 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1853 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1641 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2274 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1750 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $254,851 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 68 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | \\\SAVI0N1/// | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | VNko | 63% | 38 |
| #3 | KoL1o | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | :) | 54% | 63 |
| #5 | crsdR | 54% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ManBlack⁶⁶⁶ | 50% | 18 |
| #8 | NAik | 50% | 88 |
| #9 | theos | 46% | 13 |
| #10 | predator | 45% | 33 |
| #11 | ✪v0Lx | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crsdR | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | strange | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | :) | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | VNko | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | NAik | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | strange | 341 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #2 | NAik | 203 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | :) | 195 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | predator | 137 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #5 | crsdR | 119 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | theos | +3.79 | 66 | 66 |
| #2 | \\\SAVI0N1/// | +2.99 | 65 | 51 |
| #3 | ✪v0Lx | +2.11 | 90 | 72 |
| #4 | VNko | +1.65 | 67 | 70 |
| #5 | ManBlack⁶⁶⁶ | +0.88 | 78 | 67 |





