








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 290 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 440 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 94 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4740 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,539 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4668 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5599 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 3453 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1819 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,178,303 of utility $235 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | soup | 65% | 57 |
| #2 | Sandy | 58% | 88 |
| #3 | Scooty-Puff Jr. | 56% | 194 |
| #4 | Twiz | 51% | 232 |
| #5 | Kimmy Gibbler | 48% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ceebanks | 47% | 81 |
| #8 | SozeN | 47% | 227 |
| #9 | irish` | 41% | 39 |
| #10 | dr. dad | 40% | 85 |
| #11 | Penguin | 31% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SozeN | 9 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | dr. dad | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Kimmy Gibbler | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Twiz | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | foxbox | 5 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Twiz | 616 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #2 | SozeN | 474 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #3 | Scooty-Puff Jr. | 378 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | ceebanks | 278 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #5 | soup | 221 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SozeN | +2.92 | 60 | 74 |
| #2 | Scooty-Puff Jr. | +2.25 | 82 | 66 |
| #3 | Sandy | +1.83 | 69 | 59 |
| #4 | soup | +0.63 | 57 | 77 |
| #5 | Twiz | +0.30 | 69 | 69 |





