








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 614 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Faceit | 85 matches | ||
| Esplay | 69 matches | 2,017 | |
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4392 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,670 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6152 | 33% |
| Smokes | 4950 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3576 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3992 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $412,280 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 147 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Rawnk | 51% | 47 |
| #8 | sjokor0lf | 50% | 54 |
| #9 | aLVAREZ | 50% | 120 |
| #10 | krille | 48% | 64 |
| #11 | VERAC | 41% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aLVAREZ | 15 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | stian.K | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | krille | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | sjokor0lf | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | VERAC | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aLVAREZ | 257 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | VERAC | 227 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #3 | stian.K | 168 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | krille | 148 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | sjokor0lf | 127 | 0.11 | 3 min |





