








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1416 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,241 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2088 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1559 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1066 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1528 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $268,044 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Ty | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | itstommy | 60% | 25 |
| #4 | WorldxChaos | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | cy ツ | 49% | 93 |
| #6 | BlindMan-_x | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cy ツ | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cy ツ | 442 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #2 | itstommy | 218 | 0.42 | 7 min |
| #3 | BlindMan-_x | 34 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | WorldxChaos | 33 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ty | 21 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ty | +5.24 | 96 | 61 |
| #2 | itstommy | +2.68 | 77 | 81 |
| #3 | eychesdot | +0.69 | 68 | 72 |
| #4 | WorldxChaos | -0.36 | 85 | 55 |
| #5 | BlindMan-_x | -0.45 | 69 | 80 |





