








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 180 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 124 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1466 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,421 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1495 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1928 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1738 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1260 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $512,936 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | TrevorLahey69 | 34% | 65 |
| #16 | Bekker | 29% | 24 |
| #17 | ShakEEEbroh | 29% | 42 |
| #18 | divine | 27% | 11 |
| #19 | ZaeteR | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DustiiDK | 3 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Desh1e | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | ShakEEEbroh | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Zlatni | 2 | 0.0065 |
| #5 | Mighty Denicz | 2 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qtz | 193 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #2 | Desh1e | 137 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | Bekker | 132 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #4 | Dallimba | 105 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #5 | Mighty Denicz | 102 | 0.37 | 2 min |





