








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
145 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 505 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 102 | 20% |
| Smokes | 126 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 142 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 135 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $69,662 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B Sim | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | kyro | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | yOGGi | 67% | 12 |
| #4 | Skjöldur | 57% | 14 |
| #5 | Kaztro is rws | 57% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | yOGGi | 67% | 12 |
| #4 | Skjöldur | 57% | 14 |
| #5 | Kaztro is rws | 57% | 14 |
| #6 | tucuxi | 33% | 3 |
| #7 | 7OXIC | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kaztro is rws | 70 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #2 | Skjöldur | 49 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | yOGGi | 11 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | kyro | 11 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | tucuxi | 5 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B Sim | +2.88 | 26 | 69 |
| #2 | kyro | +2.24 | 89 | 69 |
| #3 | yOGGi | +0.65 | 64 | 56 |
| #4 | Kaztro is rws | +0.08 | 59 | 80 |
| #5 | Skjöldur | -0.07 | 70 | 63 |





