








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 226 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Renown | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1118 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,174 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 885 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1034 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1341 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 914 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $352,923 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | BabuskaKompot | 56% | 91 |
| #5 | Xo - | 55% | 11 |
| #6 | Gu1dotoN | 54% | 70 |
| #7 | t0mmmm1 | 49% | 51 |
| #8 | Tomi.K | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BabuskaKompot | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Gu1dotoN | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Tomi.K | 2 | 0.0097 |
| #4 | t0mmmm1 | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Xo - | 1 | 0.0043 |





