








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 625 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Faceit | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 135 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5438 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,890 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8153 | 37% |
| Smokes | 6182 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6655 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 900 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,541,068 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 629 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShiG[J] | 56% | 102 |
| #2 | Lennon | 55% | 123 |
| #3 | kevf | 55% | 42 |
| #4 | bp21 | 54% | 63 |
| #5 | Boostey | 54% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | ⓜⓘⓚⓔ | 50% | 52 |
| #12 | Bidet | 47% | 116 |
| #13 | Atum | 47% | 123 |
| #14 | SnooZe Airlines | 44% | 192 |
| #15 | GabdaG | 42% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SnooZe Airlines | 14 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Holocene | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Gza | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | w1cked | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Lennon | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holocene | 749 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #2 | SnooZe Airlines | 495 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #3 | Lennon | 469 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #4 | Gza | 423 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #5 | kees | 298 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lennon | +6.52 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | ShiG[J] | +3.49 | 75 | 72 |
| #3 | ⓜⓘⓚⓔ | +2.55 | 71 | 67 |
| #4 | w1cked | +2.50 | 68 | 56 |
| #5 | arf | +1.51 | 69 | 77 |





