








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 150 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1528 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,533 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1077 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1942 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2089 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1425 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $433,678 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DrippieWhit | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | DJANGO | 79% | 14 |
| #3 | woody | 73% | 15 |
| #4 | gr4y | 73% | 22 |
| #5 | irv | 69% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | benny space guy | 61% | 18 |
| #9 | reezymfk | 60% | 10 |
| #10 | cygn1us | 57% | 14 |
| #11 | Blynk | 55% | 11 |
| #12 | JG | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Taking-Lives | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | benny space guy | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | DJANGO | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gr4y | 138 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #2 | Taking-Lives | 103 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | woody | 95 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #4 | cygn1us | 95 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| #5 | Moogabooga | 57 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | woody | +3.08 | 89 | 66 |
| #2 | Moogabooga | +2.51 | 71 | 69 |
| #3 | Blynk | +2.12 | 60 | 58 |
| #4 | DJANGO | +1.55 | 75 | 75 |
| #5 | myx | +0.98 | 62 | 55 |





