








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 629 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 158 matches | ||
| Faceit | 124 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4415 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,059 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3675 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3704 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3181 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3499 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $755,033 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 411 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wieBz | 77% | 22 |
| #2 | myx | 63% | 35 |
| #3 | Blynk | 62% | 42 |
| #4 | Jera [No Monitor] | 61% | 49 |
| #5 | benny space guy | 53% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | DJANGO | 51% | 160 |
| #8 | irv | 50% | 32 |
| #9 | emile | 50% | 112 |
| #10 | Skrunk | 48% | 29 |
| #11 | bluef0x | 47% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJANGO | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | benny space guy | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | emile | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Jera [No Monitor] | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | myx | 4 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJANGO | 533 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #2 | emile | 410 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #3 | benny space guy | 287 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | bluef0x | 279 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | reezymfk | 208 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wieBz | +3.62 | 83 | 58 |
| #2 | Blynk | +2.30 | 62 | 70 |
| #3 | Skrunk | +1.58 | 64 | 60 |
| #4 | Jera [No Monitor] | +1.44 | 53 | 70 |
| #5 | Taking-Lives | +0.74 | 69 | 65 |





