








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 44 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 152 matches | ||
| Faceit | 112 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2671 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,523 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3242 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2802 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3129 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2350 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,033,482 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 268 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ScRaF | 57% | 23 |
| #2 | Cusi | 55% | 58 |
| #3 | Meddon | 55% | 175 |
| #4 | R1Kz-_- | 53% | 120 |
| #5 | DestroYar | 53% | 201 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | elesde | 41% | 27 |
| #14 | Lenny | 39% | 56 |
| #15 | FaVo | 38% | 26 |
| #16 | .tschättu | 38% | 58 |
| #17 | T-Dawg | 26% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DestroYar | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Meddon | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | xDrK | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | elesde | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | R1Kz-_- | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meddon | 963 | 0.25 | 22 min |
| #2 | DestroYar | 581 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #3 | R1Kz-_- | 251 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Cusi | 159 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | dnz ツ | 145 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smyce :) | +3.02 | 87 | 68 |
| #2 | Bundigande | BB | +1.61 | 82 | 63 |
| #3 | xDrK | +1.37 | 75 | 56 |
| #4 | Sim | +1.20 | 80 | 64 |
| #5 | zuLE * | +0.65 | 71 | 65 |





