








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 580 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 551 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5158 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,614 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10231 | 31% |
| Smokes | 8958 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6995 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6430 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,208,458 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 236 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ConAction#Ping4Life <3 | 53% | 133 |
| #2 | MyFelix | 53% | 51 |
| #3 | BROCONUT | 49% | 37 |
| #4 | nastY ♥ | 49% | 70 |
| #5 | Das Tier | 48% | 156 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | D4VID0 | 46% | 226 |
| #12 | PengBang | 45% | 110 |
| #13 | Victor Hugenay | 41% | 58 |
| #14 | jns | 41% | 200 |
| #15 | mell0w | 39% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skunkner | 13 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | felixG | 8 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | fICHTAR | 6 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Das Tier | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | ConAction#Ping4Life <3 | 6 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fICHTAR | 757 | 0.09 | 20 min |
| #2 | Das Tier | 385 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #3 | PengBang | 333 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #4 | skunkner | 303 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #5 | felixG | 301 | 0.04 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ConAction#Ping4Life <3 | +3.60 | 66 | 59 |
| #2 | micha` | +2.07 | 79 | 69 |
| #3 | nastY ♥ | +1.84 | 78 | 70 |
| #4 | mell0w | +1.30 | 78 | 59 |
| #5 | Victor Hugenay | +0.77 | 72 | 81 |





