








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 140 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,045 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2136 | 42% |
| Smokes | 1041 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 939 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 929 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,551,471 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 523 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saeko Busujima | 81% | 26 |
| #2 | Mit Raffinesse in die Fresse | 74% | 31 |
| #3 | GoonGoon2009 | 73% | 66 |
| #4 | tobbz_fpv | 63% | 24 |
| #5 | (N.W.A) Gustav | 60% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | GoonGoon2009 | 73% | 66 |
| #4 | tobbz_fpv | 63% | 24 |
| #5 | (N.W.A) Gustav | 60% | 55 |
| #6 | GumGum | 58% | 53 |
| #7 | LegendaryWombat | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | (N.W.A) Gustav | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | GoonGoon2009 | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | LegendaryWombat | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | GumGum | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Mit Raffinesse in die Fresse | 3 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | (N.W.A) Gustav | 201 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | GoonGoon2009 | 166 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | Mit Raffinesse in die Fresse | 110 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | LegendaryWombat | 59 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | tobbz_fpv | 48 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saeko Busujima | +9.00 | 97 | 28 |
| #2 | Mit Raffinesse in die Fresse | +6.12 | 78 | 73 |
| #3 | (N.W.A) Gustav | +3.48 | 58 | 58 |
| #4 | GoonGoon2009 | +3.24 | 59 | 48 |
| #5 | MythicalWombat | +2.55 | 56 | 45 |





