








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 62 matches | ||
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
891 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,970 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 452 | 23% |
| Smokes | 355 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 604 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 559 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $605,444 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 200 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aleks #clash.gg | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | hellcat owner | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | Negård | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | John | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | AnitaMaxWynn | 52% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snow bunny | 170 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #2 | AnitaMaxWynn | 129 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | hellcat owner | 50 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Negård | 45 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Aleks #clash.gg | 24 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John | +5.12 | 59 | 42 |
| #2 | snow bunny | +3.87 | 67 | 43 |
| #3 | Negård | +2.66 | 74 | 48 |
| #4 | Aleks #clash.gg | +1.24 | 53 | 48 |
| #5 | hellcat owner | +0.17 | 63 | 49 |





