








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 450 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 182 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1791 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,554 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1035 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1008 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1718 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 793 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $725,083 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 497 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2bias ツ | 59% | 51 |
| #2 | Gaian | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | tisselur #ClashGG | 55% | 40 |
| #4 | Lars Monsen | 51% | 49 |
| #5 | John | 50% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Black Sugar | 47% | 17 |
| #9 | Aleks #clash.gg | 42% | 62 |
| #10 | Negård | 39% | 127 |
| #11 | snow bunny | 35% | 20 |
| #12 | LeBroon donk1d | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Negård | 43 | 0.0165 |
| #2 | 2bias ツ | 14 | 0.0128 |
| #3 | AnitaMaxWynn | 12 | 0.0123 |
| #4 | Lars Monsen | 11 | 0.0107 |
| #5 | John | 9 | 0.0252 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Negård | 240 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Lars Monsen | 207 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #3 | AnitaMaxWynn | 156 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | tisselur #ClashGG | 101 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Aleks #clash.gg | 81 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2bias ツ | +5.79 | 75 | 68 |
| #2 | Gaian | +2.93 | 51 | 31 |
| #3 | Kvinne Benekter Nr 1 | +2.82 | 64 | 72 |
| #4 | John | +1.88 | 63 | 51 |
| #5 | tisselur #ClashGG | +1.75 | 60 | 58 |





