








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 321 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1826 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,693 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1399 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1219 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1411 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1664 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $388,654 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 189 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DED | 60% | 111 |
| #2 | FURRYLOVER | 51% | 68 |
| #3 | Hydro | 45% | 31 |
| #4 | NARI | 13% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DED | 60% | 111 |
| #2 | FURRYLOVER | 51% | 68 |
| #3 | Hydro | 45% | 31 |
| #4 | NARI | 13% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FURRYLOVER | 8 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | DED | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | NARI | 4 | 0.0225 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DED | 243 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | Hydro | 150 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #3 | FURRYLOVER | 101 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | NARI | 30 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frog | +2.23 | 86 | 65 |
| #2 | DED | +1.44 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | FURRYLOVER | -0.40 | 91 | 40 |
| #4 | Hydro | -1.87 | 51 | 70 |
| #5 | NARI | -6.47 | 43 | 21 |





