








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 195 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,620 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2198 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2219 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1428 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1775 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $198,931 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 93 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Tinussian | 65% | 40 |
| #8 | pudge_ | 64% | 11 |
| #9 | stan | 63% | 60 |
| #10 | ETA | 54% | 13 |
| #11 | Cat branchman | 53% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | im guwu | +6.06 | 75 | 43 |
| #2 | astolfo | +5.39 | 78 | 71 |
| #3 | sad sealo im sad sealo | +5.22 | 85 | 41 |
| #4 | pudge_ | +4.95 | 78 | 52 |
| #5 | Noose | +4.18 | 88 | 55 |





