








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 389 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2343 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,577 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1396 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1168 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1809 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1204 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $731,971 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m o n k e | 87% | 15 |
| #2 | wealthy | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | astolfo | 63% | 60 |
| #4 | TheNutBuster4000 | 63% | 73 |
| #5 | sad sealo im sad sealo | 62% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cannibal | 7 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | TheNutBuster4000 | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Tinussian | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | sad sealo im sad sealo | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | m o n k e | 2 | 0.0064 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | astolfo | +5.89 | 73 | 68 |
| #2 | sad sealo im sad sealo | +5.30 | 80 | 30 |
| #3 | wealthy | +5.22 | 81 | 65 |
| #4 | cannibal | +5.04 | 75 | 72 |
| #5 | stan | +2.47 | 85 | 60 |





