








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 396 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1639 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,300 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2275 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1158 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1970 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 897 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $422,240 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 301 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Chef | 47% | 17 |
| #8 | lunjus | 46% | 186 |
| #9 | wunna | 43% | 98 |
| #10 | メMelvinTheDestroyer | 38% | 58 |
| #11 | mine_less2 | 27% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | punjus | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | DPa1ms | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | lunjus | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | wunna | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | メMelvinTheDestroyer | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | punjus | 297 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #2 | lunjus | 234 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | メMelvinTheDestroyer | 135 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | wunna | 128 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | DPa1ms | 124 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | < blank > | +6.16 | 76 | 67 |
| #2 | DPa1ms | +3.75 | 64 | 42 |
| #3 | Flicko Mode | +3.53 | 69 | 67 |
| #4 | punjus | +2.70 | 43 | 46 |
| #5 | Chef | +1.96 | 52 | 43 |





