








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4619 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,570 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2498 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3830 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2078 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3164 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,466,465 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 336 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flicko Mode | 55% | 134 |
| #2 | lunjus | 54% | 92 |
| #3 | punjus | 54% | 95 |
| #4 | DPa1ms | 51% | 144 |
| #5 | Gunjoid | 49% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Gunjoid | 49% | 43 |
| #6 | メMelvinTheDestroyer | 47% | 55 |
| #7 | Chef | 44% | 151 |
| #8 | wunna | 42% | 120 |
| #9 | mine_less2 | 37% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chef | 15 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | DPa1ms | 15 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | mine_less2 | 9 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | wunna | 7 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Flicko Mode | 5 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flicko Mode | 235 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | Chef | 202 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | DPa1ms | 152 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | Gunjoid | 113 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | wunna | 98 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | < blank > | +3.94 | 76 | 61 |
| #2 | Flicko Mode | +2.06 | 64 | 59 |
| #3 | Chef | +1.07 | 49 | 47 |
| #4 | DPa1ms | -0.23 | 54 | 35 |
| #5 | punjus | -0.59 | 39 | 37 |





