








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1128 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 234 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




74 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2978 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,681 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3669 | 38% |
| Smokes | 1536 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2790 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1686 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $716,334 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5095 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bugs Bunny | 51% | 92 |
| #2 | Frenchie | 49% | 246 |
| #3 | Openz | 47% | 47 |
| #4 | Swift | 46% | 48 |
| #5 | DJLobster# #Doggo#### ### ### | 46% | 223 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | DJLobster# #Doggo#### ### ### | 46% | 223 |
| #6 | SUBNORMAL | 40% | 30 |
| #7 | budderball | 39% | 163 |
| #8 | Lankstr | 38% | 39 |
| #9 | Foreskin Collector69 | 38% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frenchie | 55 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | Lankstr | 17 | 0.0221 |
| #3 | budderball | 11 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | DJLobster# #Doggo#### ### ### | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Bugs Bunny | 9 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJLobster# #Doggo#### ### ### | 894 | 0.20 | 22 min |
| #2 | budderball | 579 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #3 | Frenchie | 203 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | Bugs Bunny | 192 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Swift | 167 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frenchie | +4.98 | 87 | 45 |
| #2 | DJLobster# #Doggo#### ### ### | +3.77 | 68 | 68 |
| #3 | Bugs Bunny | +2.81 | 72 | 48 |
| #4 | Lankstr | +2.60 | 59 | 50 |
| #5 | Swift | +0.42 | 63 | 66 |





