










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 174 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 26 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
322 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,000 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 166 | 17% |
| Smokes | 188 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 332 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 314 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $195,258 of utility $229 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JohnERico2nd | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | Sheep | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Niloc | 63% | 32 |
| #4 | kuth | 62% | 29 |
| #5 | Rise | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JohnERico2nd | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | Sheep | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Niloc | 63% | 32 |
| #4 | kuth | 62% | 29 |
| #5 | Rise | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kuth | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Niloc | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | JohnERico2nd | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kuth | 54 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | Niloc | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | JohnERico2nd | 21 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | Sheep | 15 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | Rise | 11 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Niloc | +5.44 | 96 | 51 |
| #2 | JohnERico2nd | +3.08 | 74 | 68 |
| #3 | Sheep | +2.70 | 71 | 72 |
| #4 | yuta | -1.03 | 51 | 50 |
| #5 | kuth | -2.22 | 59 | 40 |





