








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 257 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 201 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 108 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3372 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,923 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3033 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4819 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 2313 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2758 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,364,843 of utility $223 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 380 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Smush0 | 42% | 76 |
| #5 | Brett | 41% | 245 |
| 41% | 32 | ||
| #7 | Official_Calypso | 40% | 177 |
| 19% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| +2.41 | 44 | 68 | ||
| #2 | Appa | +2.35 | 38 | 69 |
| +1.46 | 75 | 40 | ||
| #4 | LordNugNug | +0.29 | 82 | 18 |
| #5 | Smush0 | -1.16 | 47 | 53 |





