








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1366 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 256 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4767 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,758 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3661 | 22% |
| Smokes | 5741 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3520 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3836 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $961,989 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 734 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Yi Lon Ma | 62% | 29 |
| #4 | dnishkina400kg | 60% | 72 |
| #5 | kiobu | 58% | 50 |
| #6 | [Miku] Gabbah | 53% | 45 |
| #7 | marc7708 | 52% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dnishkina400kg | 277 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | [Miku] Gabbah | 180 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #3 | kiobu | 147 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | (he/they) femmy kittyboy :3 | 119 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Yi Lon Ma | 51 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yi Lon Ma | +4.06 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | dnishkina400kg | +2.09 | 88 | 59 |
| #3 | (he/they) femmy kittyboy :3 | +1.85 | 66 | 59 |
| #4 | marc7708 | +1.49 | 66 | 63 |
| #5 | isgoat | +1.40 | 40 | 50 |





