








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 533 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 359 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 192 matches | ||
| Wingman | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




161 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6286 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,650 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3514 | 17% |
| Smokes | 7413 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 4829 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4894 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,573,506 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 906 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | руки вверх | 54% | 180 |
| #2 | Hinttiina | 51% | 130 |
| #3 | Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla | 47% | 66 |
| #4 | Fet | 41% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | руки вверх | 54% | 180 |
| #2 | Hinttiina | 51% | 130 |
| #3 | Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla | 47% | 66 |
| #4 | Fet | 41% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | руки вверх | 70 | 0.0213 |
| #2 | Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla | 25 | 0.0214 |
| #3 | Hinttiina | 19 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | Fet | 5 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | руки вверх | 287 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Hinttiina | 216 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla | 77 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Fet | 73 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla Yalla | +3.05 | 57 | 40 |
| #2 | руки вверх | +2.92 | 58 | 45 |
| #3 | Kemin Keisari | -0.64 | 52 | 49 |
| #4 | Hinttiina | -0.86 | 31 | 54 |
| #5 | Fet | -2.93 | 15 | 37 |





