








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 198 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 231 matches | ||
| Faceit | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2763 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,124 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1684 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2445 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2504 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2491 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,482,949 of utility $259 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Капитан Ксарнекс | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | ShittyBoyz | 61% | 95 |
| #3 | 789 UnSpOoF | 57% | 82 |
| #4 | Psychorunt | 54% | 57 |
| #5 | Mar | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Psychorunt | 54% | 57 |
| #5 | Mar | 52% | 33 |
| #6 | expyre | 49% | 96 |
| #7 | good boy | 47% | 87 |
| #8 | relax | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShittyBoyz | 15 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | 789 UnSpOoF | 15 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Капитан Ксарнекс | 5 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | good boy | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Psychorunt | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 789 UnSpOoF | 675 | 0.39 | 16 min |
| #2 | ShittyBoyz | 549 | 0.27 | 15 min |
| #3 | expyre | 454 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #4 | good boy | 254 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | relax | 101 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Капитан Ксарнекс | +4.07 | 80 | 28 |
| #2 | ShittyBoyz | +4.06 | 71 | 75 |
| #3 | good boy | +2.41 | 73 | 55 |
| #4 | 789 UnSpOoF | +1.89 | 59 | 73 |
| #5 | Psychorunt | -0.08 | 44 | 40 |





