








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 363 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1392 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,711 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1529 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1117 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1088 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 977 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $458,774 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 173 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BAPPO | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | Funip | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | SHARPNESS | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | Jüri | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | ballerina capuccina | 49% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Funip | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | SHARPNESS | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | Jüri | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | ballerina capuccina | 49% | 113 |
| #6 | Annelinn Väriseb | 42% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ballerina capuccina | 28 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | SHARPNESS | 12 | 0.0174 |
| #3 | Annelinn Väriseb | 8 | 0.0165 |
| #4 | BAPPO | 2 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ballerina capuccina | 470 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #2 | SHARPNESS | 87 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Annelinn Väriseb | 75 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | BAPPO | 37 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Jüri | 15 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Funip | +3.31 | 89 | 37 |
| #2 | SHARPNESS | +2.70 | 62 | 43 |
| #3 | Annelinn Väriseb | +0.09 | 48 | 60 |
| #4 | ballerina capuccina | -0.22 | 54 | 56 |
| #5 | Cupra | -0.60 | 53 | 50 |





