








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 237 matches | ||
| Wingman | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




90 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4331 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,678 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1468 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1172 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1650 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1388 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,174,404 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 642 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kondombrecher | 61% | 36 |
| #2 | Tom | 52% | 166 |
| #3 | Dobssen | 51% | 85 |
| #4 | Carl Gallagher | 50% | 107 |
| #5 | Ich kann laufen | weg.de | 48% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carl Gallagher | 32 | 0.0164 |
| #2 | Tom | 26 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | Pussy hunter | 23 | 0.0225 |
| #4 | Ich kann laufen | weg.de | 12 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | Dobssen | 10 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tom | 167 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #2 | Ich kann laufen | weg.de | 141 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | whatisupboizz | 109 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Kondombrecher | 97 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | Carl Gallagher | 84 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kondombrecher | +2.36 | 46 | 57 |
| #2 | Carl Gallagher | +1.73 | 51 | 39 |
| #3 | Tom | +1.60 | 44 | 39 |
| #4 | Pussy hunter | +0.78 | 41 | 36 |
| #5 | Ich kann laufen | weg.de | +0.52 | 62 | 55 |





