








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 648 matches | ||
| Premier | 230 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 157 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




128 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9760 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,289 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6653 | 23% |
| Smokes | 7933 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8068 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 6635 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,029,460 of utility $43 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 836 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HELLCAT β₯ | 64% | 91 |
| #2 | THEYOUNGGWOLF | 59% | 71 |
| #3 | Kaiser | 56% | 342 |
| #4 | π΄πππππ | 55% | 102 |
| #5 | AFβERLIF3 XΔ | 49% | 885 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | THEYOUNGGWOLF | 59% | 71 |
| #3 | Kaiser | 56% | 342 |
| #4 | π΄πππππ | 55% | 102 |
| #5 | AFβERLIF3 XΔ | 49% | 885 |
| #6 | π!βΆπππππ | 47% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kaiser | 36 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | π΄πππππ | 17 | 0.0086 |
| #3 | AFβERLIF3 XΔ | 15 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | π!βΆπππππ | 11 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | HELLCAT β₯ | 6 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HELLCAT β₯ | 338 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | Kaiser | 294 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #3 | π΄πππππ | 270 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #4 | AFβERLIF3 XΔ | 241 | 0.02 | 6 min |
| #5 | π!βΆπππππ | 138 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π΄πππππ | +2.87 | 68 | 38 |
| #2 | AFβERLIF3 XΔ | +2.72 | 78 | 43 |
| #3 | HELLCAT β₯ | +2.60 | 72 | 63 |
| #4 | Kaiser | +2.08 | 43 | 37 |
| #5 | THEYOUNGGWOLF | +0.66 | 42 | 49 |





