








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 114 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 126 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 99 matches | ||
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4894 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,478 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5310 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5110 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2446 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3612 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $677,482 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 351 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kaiser | 76% | 45 |
| #2 | ShadowHeist | 69% | 39 |
| #3 | Xylx | 69% | 32 |
| #4 | AF✞ERLIF3 XĐ | 65% | 31 |
| #5 | hannibal | 64% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TAGDA DAHEJ ENJOYER | +3.04 | 72 | 56 |
| #2 | HELLCAT ♥ | +2.64 | 73 | 65 |
| #3 | Xylx | +2.53 | 63 | 34 |
| #4 | Kaiser | +1.64 | 49 | 43 |
| #5 | AF✞ERLIF3 XĐ | +1.02 | 74 | 37 |





