








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
214 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 922 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 189 | 20% |
| Smokes | 209 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 328 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 196 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $123,723 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | 2 | 50% | 12 |
| #6 | Muffins... | 50% | 22 |
| #7 | Xcreed | 47% | 19 |
| #8 | Centralfiction 𝔇𝔞𝔫𝔡y | 39% | 18 |
| #9 | Samuel "God" Räsänen | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grognak | 4 | 0.0374 |
| #2 | Centralfiction 𝔇𝔞𝔫𝔡y | 3 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | knL | 3 | 0.0280 |
| #4 | Xcreed | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Muffins... | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xcreed | 73 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | Zesttoo | 41 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | Centralfiction 𝔇𝔞𝔫𝔡y | 41 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | Muffins... | 23 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | knL | 14 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | knL | +10.90 | 72 | 43 |
| #2 | Zesttoo | +3.80 | 77 | 51 |
| #3 | Xcreed | +1.40 | 68 | 57 |
| #4 | 2 | +0.42 | 81 | 21 |
| #5 | Centralfiction 𝔇𝔞𝔫𝔡y | -0.99 | 65 | 53 |





