








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 129 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,022 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 813 | 27% |
| Smokes | 403 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 523 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1283 | 42% |
Our logs show you have wasted $623,678 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 533 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | George Floyd | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | Sean O'Malley ⛟ | 65% | 43 |
| #3 | Kerppu | 64% | 111 |
| #4 | Kopeanuoli | 58% | 138 |
| #5 | Niisku | 57% | 133 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Kerppu | 64% | 111 |
| #4 | Kopeanuoli | 58% | 138 |
| #5 | Niisku | 57% | 133 |
| #6 | 𝕽𝖊𝖉 | 54% | 13 |
| #7 | Makita | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kerppu | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Sean O'Malley ⛟ | 5 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Niisku | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Makita | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kerppu | 227 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | Kopeanuoli | 123 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #3 | Niisku | 107 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #4 | 𝕽𝖊𝖉 | 87 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| #5 | Sean O'Malley ⛟ | 34 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | George Floyd | +5.34 | 96 | 77 |
| #2 | Loki | +4.18 | 91 | 46 |
| #3 | 𝕽𝖊𝖉 | +2.53 | 79 | 59 |
| #4 | Kerppu | +1.95 | 79 | 66 |
| #5 | Kopeanuoli | -0.19 | 68 | 60 |





