








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
267 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 234 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 90 | 38% |
| Smokes | 23 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 76 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 45 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $47,366 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MikeyFstops | 40% | 5 |
| #2 | TriangleMan | 35% | 20 |
| #3 | agooglesearchofkendricklamar | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | bookagame | 29% | 7 |
| #5 | Joeranger | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MikeyFstops | 40% | 5 |
| #2 | TriangleMan | 35% | 20 |
| #3 | agooglesearchofkendricklamar | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | bookagame | 29% | 7 |
| #5 | Joeranger | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bookagame | 4 | 0.0396 |
| #2 | Joeranger | 3 | 0.0294 |
| #3 | TriangleMan | 2 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TriangleMan | 68 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #2 | bookagame | 11 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #3 | Joeranger | 2 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #4 | MikeyFstops | 2 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | agooglesearchofkendricklamar | 1 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImMcGarbage | +0.58 | 90 | 30 |
| #2 | bookagame | +0.25 | 92 | 71 |
| #3 | MikeyFstops | -2.39 | 63 | 29 |
| #4 | TriangleMan | -3.48 | 64 | 42 |
| #5 | Joeranger | -5.21 | 19 | 0 |





