








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 31 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1830 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,520 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 556 | 37% |
| Smokes | 315 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 419 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 230 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $132,297 of utility $28 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | These Crackers are Dope | 45% | 20 |
| #2 | Cyanidex | 43% | 14 |
| #3 | deB | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | These Crackers are Dope | 45% | 20 |
| #2 | Cyanidex | 43% | 14 |
| #3 | deB | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | These Crackers are Dope | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deB | 94 | 0.36 | 2 min |
| #2 | These Crackers are Dope | 44 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Cyanidex | 37 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | These Crackers are Dope | +1.72 | 37 | 68 |
| #2 | MikeyFstops | -0.17 | 39 | 29 |
| #3 | deB | -1.74 | 31 | 84 |
| #4 | Cyanidex | -3.54 | 67 | 37 |





