








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 251 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1490 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,742 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 629 | 23% |
| Smokes | 922 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 526 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 665 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $348,288 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 299 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FriendlyBoomer | 56% | 82 |
| #2 | Dremimew | 51% | 59 |
| #3 | Honus | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FriendlyBoomer | 56% | 82 |
| #2 | Dremimew | 51% | 59 |
| #3 | Honus | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FriendlyBoomer | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Dremimew | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Honus | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FriendlyBoomer | 284 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | Dremimew | 140 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | Honus | 77 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dremimew | +2.25 | 61 | 61 |
| #2 | Honus | +0.88 | 67 | 61 |
| #3 | ₴Ʉ₱ɆⱤ₥ØØ₦ | +0.70 | 69 | 41 |
| #4 | FriendlyBoomer | -0.51 | 31 | 69 |





